I’d like a diet soda, and some extra ranch.

It's a weird thing that I have been wondering about since I first started serving, what is the obsession with diet sodas? More specifically, why do people think diet soda will make them lose weight? You see this is the problem with our society when it comes to health, we mistake low in fat for healthy. We are obsessed with diets and eating light, or low in fat. The problem with this is that we feel this gives us the liberty to splurge somewhere else so we end up eating more than ever before. Every day I work I see examples of this, one such example happened just the other day. I introduced myself to the table and when I asked what drinks they would like they were extremely adamant about drinking strictly diet soda. When I brought the sodas to the table they insisted that they were not diets and they forced me to bring another round of drinks. I went to the back to check the soda lines and true enough everything was hooked up right so I brought out another set of drinks to placate them. I figured "ok, they're on a diet, I understand." But when I took their order I was extremely surprised when they ordered the highest in calorie appetizer, salads with extra ranch, and deep-dish pizza (also with extra ranch.) I don't get it, why make such a big deal about having to have diet soda (which I'm sorry, tastes like crap) when you're eating instant heart attack? I mean really man, if you're gonna splurge just go for the gold and enjoy yourself, but don't lie to yourself and think that diet soda gives you a free pass to eat whatever you want, (stepping down from soap box). This same situation happens all the time and I still don't get it, maybe you can enlighten me. It sure can be confusing when you're living, in the weeds.

T.I.P.S

This time around I would like to discuss the subject of tipping, does anyone know where this system came from? Or why it started? Well if not then you can say you've learned something today. The term TIPS comes from an old English acronym and means To Insure Prompt Service. And to accomplish this, individuals who went out to eat would "tip" their waiter prior to the meal so that they would be well taken care of. That's right, at the beginning and not at the end. I find this interesting, as the custom has changed so has the definition of waiter/waitress has changed from more professional servers to the college students and single Mom's that provide the majority of the serving field today. Well I figured that would be a nice little tidbit of info, I know not as interesting as some of my other posts but I hope you find it interesting as well. That's it for now I suppose, you always learn something new when you're living, in the weeds.



P.S. When going out please consider that tips are the only way servers make any money, so tip accordingly. In other words, if your service was great and the server/bartender made a difference in making your visit an enjoyable one please tip 20% or greater. On the other hand if your waiter/waitress did not provide at least good service then use your own judgment. Thanks!

Whoa, are those real?

Yes, it’s exactly like it sounds, well kinda.  Maybe I should start at the beginning. It was a normal Wednesday night shift, kind of slow but busy in spurts, and I was working with my good friend who we’ll call Ally.  “Ally” is a beautiful young African-American woman who happens to be, well…. very blessed in the chest area to put it lightly and when she wears our uniform it makes it even worse (this is important in just a bit).  To set up the rest of the story I also have to mention that at the back of the restaurant we have a rather impressive display stand with many vintage products.  At the bottom of the display is a set up with varying types of produce that are free to take if it behooves the guest.  So as the night went along, business began to slow down and only a few tables trickled in after 9 o’clock.  One such party (a husband and wife) sat at a table in “Ally’s” section facing the back display and here is what happened,

Ally: Hello, my name is Ally and I’ll be taking care of you tonight what can I get you all to drink?

Wife: I’ll take water with lemon please.

Ally scribbled down her drink order.

Ally: And for you sir?

The Husband looked up for the first time and looked surprised commenting “Whoa are those real?” With that his wife slapped him in the chest and Ama’s jaw dropped nervously asking “excuse me?”  The man looks back and forth and is so choked up he’s unable to explain himself.  Throughout this his wife starts chastising him repeatedly and leaves him stammering in his seat.  He chases her out of the restaurant and comes back in about five minutes later and comes to explain himself to my friend,

Husband: Ma’am I am very sorry, there seems to be quite a mix up.

She looked at him skeptically as he tried to clarify what happened.

Ally: Ok, go ahead.

Husband: Well when I made the comment I did I saw the vegetables you had at your display and wondered if they were real or not.

Ally: haha, ok wow.  I didn’t even think of that. Ok apology accepted.

After that they shared a few laughs and he commented about how he just hoped his wife would believe him.  Now I’m not sure if he was telling the truth but I guess that’s for all of us to decide.  I of course was only a casual observer and was filled in on what exactly happened through her a few minutes after it all happened.  Anyway that’s all for now, it sure is crazy living in the weeds.

Don't Judge a book by it's cover.

Yes I know it’s been used a million times but it truly is a fitting title.  As a restaurant worker I can admit that we as a group can be highly judgmental which I hate but it almost becomes second nature, I have certainly learned my lesson.  The other day was a ssssllloooowwww day, and I mean it.  I was making little to no money and I was cranky because it was raining out and my car’s windshield wipers seemed to have gone kaput.  Just as I was feeling my worst I got my second table of the day after being at work for close to two hours.  It was an elderly gentleman which in server’s terms usually means no money.  So I went into the situation with entirely the wrong mindset and took his order, brought out his food, refilled his drinks, all very routine and made no attempt to give “great” service.  When it came time to pay he asked for a pen but made no motion for a card, so instantly I thought “great, now I’m gonna get a complaint.”  I come back to the table a few minutes later and the man had left, the checkbook was on the table and the remnants of his meal had been stacked up for me already.  Begrudgingly I opened up the book to see what was there, and what I saw blew me away.  Inside the man had left a note and I will share with you what he expressed to me,

            
“It seemed like you were having a bad day.  With it being so slow I don’t really blame you.  Here is something that will hopefully brighten up your day.” 

My heart swelled, because not only did he leave a sweet note but he had left a hundred dollar bill on a sixteen dollar check.  I literally had to sit down and once I got over the euphoria of being close to a hundred dollars richer I realized the shame of my situation.  I felt so bad that I had been such a hypocrite and judged the man so harshly.  So here is the obvious lesson, don’t judge a book by its cover because you never know what lay just beneath the surface, in this instance, a heart of gold.  So mystery man thank you for this life lesson and hopefully I will be able to brighten an other’s day as you did for me.  Life sure can be inspiring when your living, in the weeds.

The Cougar's Cry

When I started out this blog I figured there would be more stories regarding the hardships of working in the restaurant business, but a recent occurrence has shifted me into a different direction and I can’t help but share this with you.  And to clarify, no there was not a large cat rampaging through the booths and tables, things have yet to get that exciting.  What really happened is far more entertaining I assure you.  We all know I’m sure, of the term cougar in regards to women past the age of 45-50 who are very attractive.  Well a “Cougar” happened to make a rather blunt pass at one of my co-workers just the other night and I’ll take you through what happened as I heard it.

 It was a busy Friday night as always, and we were on a 30 minute wait.  Everything was going smooth, food was coming out on time and everyone was rather pleasant.  We had a full staff of 11 servers, 4 host(ess)’s, and a stacked kitchen.  3 managers running around like chickens with their heads cut off, and a number of large parties, one in particular had our rather wily predator.  I happened to be taking care of them, all rather pleasant and left a very generous tip.  But the most interesting part happened on their way out.  I walked up to the host stand to say my thanks as they left and to check on what open tables had and she stopped to talk with a young host friend of mine, and here’s what I heard, 
Host: Thanks for coming in guy’s, have a great night.

Cougar: Excuse me, what is your name?

Host: Umm, I’m sorry?

Cougar: Your name?

Host: Oh, um Michael, sorry, my name is Michael.

Cougar: Uh huh, and how old are you?

Host: I’m 19, uh is there anything wrong ma'm?

Cougar: No, quite the opposite actually, can I say, oh gosh I don’t ever do this kind of thing but you are one of the most attractive young men I have ever seen and I would totally go cougar for you.

Now I would write what he said next but it was nothing but an incomprehensible series of ums and choked on responses and before he could actually collect himself she stopped him. Also keep in mind that this is one of the most innocent guys I have ever met which makes this even funnier.

Cougar: Look, I’m not looking for a response now but I am leaving town in a week and I figured I’d try. 

                She handed him her number that had been hurriedly scribbled on a scrap piece of paper.

Host: Mam, I’m not sure if I can accept this.

Cougar: Just take it and think about it, there’s a lot I could teach you.

                And with that last comment she left the restaurant and drove away, her face flushed on the way out. Of course the look on his face was the best part of the whole situation which was a blend of disbelief, shock, and excitement.  Etched across his face was also the thought of what might happen if he did call.  Well anyway, I hope this little story is as entertaining to you as it is to me, as this is just one more example of living, in the weeds.

                Also, I apologize to anyone who might be offended by the term “cougar.”  I use it only because it was used in the situation and mean no disrespect by it.

And it begins....

This is a hello, bonjour, and/or guten tag to any and all who happen upon this blog.  I like many others before me and many will after have fallen for the allure and promise of a quick buck from working at a restaurant.  And while it is still possible to make a killing, I find myself questioning if its really worth it, the constant degragation and headaches that result from working a single shift on the floor.  Then of course I snap back to reality and realize where I am.  Where am I you ask? I'm at a corporate pizzeria, yes thats right, wearing a ridiculous get up and feigning a smile as I pass through the dining room pretending that I give a crap if your meal is ok, and that each time I say yes sir I die a little inside.  I am a student by trade, which is a title I desperately cling to as I fight to remain in school and I am dying for a day off.  Wheew, ok now that I am done venting (for the moment) I would like to say that I do in fact feel bad if any customers have a bad time, as I do my best to make your experience pleasant.  I also say that at times working in a restaraunt can be an enriching experience as it has opened my eyes to a great many things about what life means, and the value of empathy.  But here I am rambling again, I better go, my customer is snapping his fingers at me to get my attention, hmm, time for another fake smile.